The Pre-Dead Social Club will host "We Wish We Knew That!" When Dying at Home is the Wish—But Not Part of the Plan
Tickets go on sale JULY 23rd for Members and on Aug 1st for not-yet-members.
Tickets are $10 + $2.51 (Eventbrite fee)
Most of us—when asked—say we’d like to die at home. Surrounded by comfort. Familiar faces, sounds, and smells. Maybe a pet at our feet. And yet, most of us don’t. Not because we changed our minds—but because we didn’t know how to make it happen. This roundtable is about that gap—the space between what we hope for and what actually happens. And why.
We get it. This is uncharted territory. You’ve never died before. And while we’ve learned from those who’ve died before us, we each need to blaze a trail that reflects what matters most—to us, and to those we care for.
But what if patients, caregivers, and providers had a shared roadmap—something we could lean over and look at together? What if we stopped driving blindly toward the horizon, and instead paid attention to the turns, the off-ramps, the places to pause and prepare? We Wish We Knew That applies to everyone in the room.
During this roundtable we will explore what gets in the way, what helps us move forward, and how we can each play a part in closing that gap—whether we’re doing the caring, the coordinating, or simply hoping for a more peaceful path.
Who should attend? The “WE” in our title invites individuals with a stake in these conversations (now or in the future) including, but not limited to:
Family caregivers—local or long-distance, current or anticipating
People living with serious illness or advancing age who want to better understand their choices
Primary care providers, hospice nurses, and social workers looking to bridge care gaps with more confidence and compassion
Senior center staff, faith leaders, and community advocates supporting end-of-life planning
Death Doulas and Care Managers
Anyone who’s said “I want to die at home,” or is supporting a loved one who has voiced that desire
Solo agers
Let’s all lean into these conversations together.
Roundtable guests:
Dr. Nicholas Coppins, originally from England, earning his undergraduate degree in Environmental Sciences from the University of East Anglia before completing medical school at the University of Nottingham in 2009. After training in Cambridgeshire and traveling the world—including a fateful stop in Australia where he met his wife—he completed his General Practice (Family Medicine) residency in Gloucestershire in 2016 and later practiced in London. Since 2019, Dr. Coppins has served the Seacoast community at Kittery Family Practice. He’s the first to admit that end-of-life care gets far too little attention in medical school—and culturally, many of us tend to avoid the subject altogether. He’s looking forward to this roundtable not just as a physician, but as a listener, learner, and advocate for clearer, kinder conversations around what matters most.
Barbara Douglass, spent over 40 years as a physical therapist after graduating from the University of Vermont, working in acute care, home health, and her own aquatic therapy practice. She found her calling in skilled nursing and rehab, specializing in geriatrics for the last 19 years of her career before retiring in 2024. Now trained as a death doula and hospice volunteer, Barbara continues to support friends and family through health challenges and encourages anyone who will listen to make a plan—because you have choices.
Her decades at the bedside give her a rare perspective: helping people regain function, and later, witnessing the various paths people take with the end of life in mind. She’s seen how goals evolve, how families struggle, and how peaceful exits take intention. These days, Barbara balances her passion for end-of-life readiness with the joy of living in the moment—often around a Mahjong table, in her kayak, or surrounded by her grandkids.
Melissa Kennedy, is a Registered Nurse (RN), Certified Hospice & Palliative Care Nurse CHPN), (Wound Care Certified (WCC) and Hospice Admissions nurse. Check back here for full bio soon.
Dannielle Haskell, is a former nonprofit director who spent years designing afterschool and summer programs for kids—and is now deep in a different kind of learning as a full-time parent to two young daughters in Southern Maine. Motherhood, she says, has given her more compassion, empathy, and perspective than any career ever could.
In early 2024, when her aunt was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer, Dannielle stepped in without hesitation—becoming a steady caregiver and a communication bridge for out-of-town family. Her aunt chose quality of life over treatment, entering hospice just weeks later. Living at a hospice house for nearly a month gave Dannielle a profound window into the reality of dying—not just its heartbreak, but its potential for beauty, connection, and grace.
She now hopes to be a voice for those standing beside a loved one at the end of life—especially those who didn’t expect to find themselves in that role. Hospice can be overwhelming, she says, but with guidance, families can show up in ways that support both their loved ones and themselves.
Facilitated by:
Laura Cleminson, is the Founder of the Pre-Dead Social Club, an INELDA-trained death doula, hospice volunteer, and a member of the NH Health Care Decisions Coalition. She’s been part of hundreds of conversations that start long before hospice is ever mentioned—ranging from; “I don’t know how to start the conversation.” “I’m afraid my doctors and family will be needlessly ‘concerned’ if I bring up dying in general, let alone at home!” “Let’s just deal with it when it happens.”
What sticks with her most is how much harder it is for everyone when wishes go unspoken—especially at the end. Laura believes that when care begins with clarity, the whole team—providers, family, and friends—can move with greater confidence and compassion. Recognizing that dying is already a fuzzy and often times complicated process—our wishes shouldn’t be a mystery or off-limits to discuss.